The pirate test – how much of a pirate are you?

For every question you answer “yes” to, add 5%. You start out at 0% pirate. (Answers are at the bottom.)

1. Can you describe what it is to be swashbuckling?
2. Do you know what grog is?
3. What is a jolly roger?
4. Pirates build fires with firewood pretty much anywhere they want atop their wooden ships. They do not need metal either. Do you know what can be used to ensure the ships do not burn down?
5. Can you point towards the stern, port, and starboard of a ship?
6. If you see a map where a ship traveled, do you know why the ship would zigzag back and forth?
7. You might go to the bathroom off the poop deck but the poop deck is called the poop deck for a non-bathroom reason. Do you know the reason?
8. Your friend complains about their joints aching. Is this information helpful to you?
9. Do you know who the Caribs are and what they ate that made them highly feared?
10. If someone handed you a bucket of pitch, would you know what to do with it?
11. Can you describe what a cay looks like?
12. You don’t have electricity on your ship but you eat meat for a few months. What do you use to keep your meat from spoiling?
13. If someone asked you when you should use the word “ahoy”, could you explain it to them?
14. You traded your sword you made that you spent 18 solid hours working on for 1/2 kilogram of cacao beans. Do you know if you ripped someone off or were ripped off?
15. Let’s say a fellow pirate could see fine out of both eyes but wore an eye patch. Do you know why they wore an eye patch.
16. Without toilet paper, do you know what is commonly used to wipe oneself?
17. Many pirates would prefer prisoners, instead of killing people when they boarded a ship. The pirates wanted their reputation to be known for not killing when they didn’t have to. Do you know why?
18. Do you know what keelhauling is?
19. Do you know what the most highly prized plunder to pirates is?
20. Who are the most feared pirates in this modern age?

Answers

Can you describe what it is to be swashbuckling? To engage in daring and romantic adventures with ostentatious bravado or flamboyance.

Do you know what grog is? It is spirits mixed with water. Some sources say that it is rum, water, lemon juice and sugar.

What is a jolly roger? The jolly roger is a pirate’s flag (many varieties exist) signifying that no mercy will be shown.

Pirates build fires with firewood pretty much anywhere they want atop their wooden ships. They do not need metal either. Do you know what can be used to ensure the ships do not burn down? They would put down a pile of sand and spread it out.

Can you point towards the stern, port, and starboard of a ship? If you are on the ship looking forward, the stern is to the back, the port is off to the left and the starboard is off to the right.

If you see a map where a ship traveled, do you know why the ship would zigzag back and forth? Ships will sometimes maneuver back and forth to protect a side as a fighting technique. They also sometimes use it in order to gain speed

You might go to the bathroom off the poop deck but the poop deck is called the poop deck for a non-bathroom reason. Do you know the reason? The poop deck is derived from pupa or pupae meaning doll. A lot of times captains would put dolls of saints for religious reasons on the railing of the upper deck which is why it is called the poop deck.

Your friend complains about their joints aching. Is this information helpful to you? Yes, this can be useful to predict a storm.

Do you know who the Caribs are and what they ate that made them highly feared? They were cannibals.

If someone handed you a bucket of pitch, would you know what to do with it? Pitch is used as a sealant for the ship to prevent leaks.

Can you describe what a cay looks like? A cay is a low bank or reef of coral, rock, or sand.

You don’t have electricity on your ship but you eat meat for a few months. What do you use to keep your meat from spoiling? They would soak it in brine. Salt prevents the spoiling of food. They ate a lot of pickled foods.

If someone asked you when you should use the word “ahoy”, could you explain it to them? Ahoy is used to point out an object in the distance.

You traded your sword you made that you spent 18 solid hours working on for 1/2 kilogram of cacao beans. Do you know if you ripped someone off or were ripped off? Cacao beans at times were worth their weight in precious metals!

Let’s say a fellow pirate could see fine out of both eyes but wore an eye patch. Do you know why they wore an eye patch. A patch is often used to help the pirates vision when they go back and forth beneath the ship where it is darker.

Without toilet paper, do you know what is commonly used to wipe oneself? They would often times use a rope slicked with pitch.

Many pirates would prefer prisoners, instead of killing people when they boarded a ship. The pirates wanted their reputation to be known for not killing when they didn’t have to. Do you know why? They did this for pragmatic reasons. They did not want their reputation to be always killing people because then no one would surrender. The people being attacked would fight to the death if they though the pirates were going to kill them anyway. It saved the pirates lives by not fighting.

Do you know what keelhauling is? If pirates want to torture someone they would often drag them by a rope off the stern.

Do you know what the most highly prized plunder to pirates is? Medicine.

Who are the most feared pirates in this modern age? Somalian pirates.